


Let's both overthink, alright?

by Morathi_Cain



Series: What is it about those engineering boys? [32]
Category: My Engineer (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Idiots in Love, M/M, Misunderstanding, Pining, Ram's POV, Yearning, a gift for someone precious, idiotsx2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:28:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27268774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morathi_Cain/pseuds/Morathi_Cain
Summary: King has been coming home late for the last two weeks and Ram wonders what he's up to.
Relationships: King/Ram (My Engineer)
Series: What is it about those engineering boys? [32]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1708738
Comments: 16
Kudos: 120





	Let's both overthink, alright?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cynical_ravenclaw](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cynical_ravenclaw/gifts).



> A birthday present for my precious friend!  
> I truly hope it's enough fluff for your taste =^^=
> 
> Have fun! =^^=

Let’s both overthink, alright?

When Ram entered the shared apartment, it was dark.  
Of course.

With a sigh, he turned on the light and pulled off his shoes, the bile rising in his throat.

Two weeks.

For two weeks King had been coming home fashionably late. Later than usual, later than he was used to. And every time he got back, he was exhausted and tired, going to bed almost instantly. After greeting every plant and Ram afterwards as if he was one of them.

At least it got him a soft ruffle through his hair and a short hug as if King had forgotten how to keep his distance.

Whenever Ram asked where he had been, King told him he had been studying, but Ram knew it was bullshit. As if he couldn’t count one and one together whenever he saw every one of King’s friends being home early. There was no way Boss would be partying instead of studying with King. Not when it was supposed to be as urgent as King tried to tell him.

So, what was he doing instead?

Ram looked around the apartment and noticed a used mug on the kitchen counter. Apparently, King had been in for a bit, before hurrying on. To whatever he was doing. To whoever he was meeting.

As Ram put the mug into the dishwasher, he felt the loneliness starting to choke him. There he was, alone in a flat which wasn’t his, while the man he was living with, was out, avoiding him or meeting someone else.

No, he reminded himself, thinking back to the hugs and the way King unconsciously shuffled closer every night.  
King wasn’t avoiding him.  
Probably.

But he was definitely doing something fishy. Something he didn’t want to tell Ram.  
And for the life of his venus fly trap, Ram couldn’t imagine anything but him meeting someone he liked. Someone he wanted to spend more time with than Ram.

King, for sure, wasn’t someone to do drugs or get roped into illegal shit.  
King was smart and wouldn’t need to study longer than any of his friends.  
King could be tutoring someone ...

Well, he really could, Ram realised. But why would he treat it like such a secret? Why would he stay so long every night then?

Except if the person he was tutoring was the one he liked.

With another sigh, he dropped down on the sofa and pulled a pillow against his chest. What a fuck up, really. Here he was, hoping for a sign of affection from King and being hopelessly in love, while King was away, spending his time with someone else instead.

The bitter taste in his mouth intensified.

What was he supposed to do now?  
Should he wait and see?  
Tell King he knew he was lying?  
Go back home silently to give King his freedom back? Maybe let him invite whoever he wanted to his flat?

That thought hurt the most. Because he really really didn’t want to go back home. On one hand because of his father and most importantly because he seriously loved living with King. If the man in question wasn’t away for most of the day at least.

No, he had to correct himself. Even then did he enjoy living here.  
They were still sleeping in the same bed, were still communicating silently and he could still watch King in the morning, desperate for coffee but so very careful with everyone and everything around him. Including Ram.

Turning to the side, Ram buried his face in the cushions and let out a groan he had desperately tried to hold in. What a fucked up situation. And he couldn’t even solve it with a stare or a punch.

Mostly, because King was dense and oblivious or at least chose to behave that way. And yeah, a punch wouldn’t help in any case.

Maybe he should stalk King?  
No.  
The thought alone felt wrong to Ram. Either King would tell him honestly, or Ram would have to be satisfied with the lie, no matter how much it hurt. But he wouldn’t let himself be reduced to a mere, desperate stalker.

Grumbling to himself and wondering about a solution for this problem, Ram slowly fell asleep, no closer to solve the damn riddle than he had been before.

A gentle touch at his shoulder brought him back, even though he felt as if he had emerged from the deep sea, needing some time to adjust to the real world again.

“King?”

The hand stopped whatever it was doing and a soft sigh was to be heard. Slowly, Ram blinked his surroundings back into focus and saw King leaning over him, a blanket in his hands.

“Sorry”, there was a soft, hesitant smile to be seen and it tugged at Ram’s heartstrings, “I didn’t want to wake you, but you seemed to be cold.”

Only now did Ram realise that he was curled around the pillow as if he was freezing instead of being heartbroken.

“Just came home?”, Ram mumbled before he realised how accusing it sounded and clamped his mouth shut.

King, at least, seemed embarrassed as he avoided Ram’s eyes and stepped back a bit, making Ram want to pull him in again.

“Yeah”, King rubbed his neck, “It took longer today.”

“What?”

“Studying”, King specified but still didn’t dare to lock eyes.

Really, Ram thought, King could have punched him instead. It would have been less painful, to be honest.

And because he didn’t know what to reply to such an obvious lie, he simply nodded and tried to get up. Since King was here, there was no reason to sleep on the sofa any longer. His stomach was growling anyway.

King, who was watching him with a guarded look in his eyes, apparently heard it as well: “Are you hungry?”

When Ram shrugged, King’s whole face lit up, as if he had just been given a present.

“Let me cook for you then!”

The enthusiasm was stunning and Ram didn’t know what to do outside of staring at the man in front of him. Why?

“You haven’t eaten and I haven’t eaten and cooking makes much more sense for two people. So, since I haven’t been able to eat with you lately, please let me cook for you.”

And who was Ram to deny this request?

The rest of the evening seemed almost normal. Like they had been before King’s mysterious study-sessions till late into the night.  
Ram could almost forget what had happened, could almost believe everything before had been a bad dream. Only himself overthinking too much.

As if to convince himself of this reality, he made a habit of touching King now and then. Just a small, soft touch as they bumped shoulders or grazed knuckles while trading plates. A gentle hold on King’s hips as the man almost backed into Ram, away from the boiling water. And tenderly brushing King’s hair out of his face to let him see, his hair by now surprisingly long.

“I should cut it”, King murmured, his cheeks obviously heating up and the sight giving Ram the satisfaction of a fed cat.

He shook his head and King averted his gaze towards the vegetables he was cutting, glued to them for the next minutes as if his life depended on it.

Although to be fair, with the way he was handling a knife, Ram guessed it was a matter of life and death.

When they finally went to bed, Ram wondered if this was evening was now the exception or the rule again. As King shuffled closer in his sleep, he desperately hoped.

~~~

The apartment was dark when he entered it the next evening.

With a sinking heart, Ram stood in the hallway, his bag dropping down with a thump.

What a joke his hopes were. To think the last night could have changed anything. As if King had suddenly realised he liked Ram enough to come home early. To spend more time with him. As if they were a couple.

Wishing himself back to his boxing equipment, Ram let out an irritated huff. He still stood in the dark, his body brimming with helplessness and irrational anger when the door suddenly opened and a stream of light hit him.

“Ram?”

King stood in the doorway, obviously surprised at the sight of Ram standing in the dark, but Ram didn’t care. Or better, he cared too much.

Turning a bit, he stared at his roommate, his crush and love.

“Are you okay? Why didn’t you turn on the light?”

Slowly, King moved into the apartment and turned on the light, his eyes still on Ram as if he could vanish any second.

There were words stuck in Ram’s throat. Words he desperately wanted to let out, no matter how wrong they felt. Would it improve anything to say them? To speak them aloud? Or would the whole card house crumble down? Finally?

And would a broken heart be better than staying ignorant?

“Ram, dude”, King slowly came closer and Ram felt the familiar pull towards the man. The pull to hold him in his arms, touch him to reassure himself that he was real.

As always, he didn’t.

“You scare me”, there was pleading in his voice now, “Please give me any sign you’re here with me.”

You want me to move out?

Ram wanted to ask.

Do you avoid me?

He would wonder every day.

What do you feel for me?

Was all he wanted to know.

But instead, he shook his head, faked a yawn and pulled off his shoes, averting his gaze so he couldn’t see whatever expression King was showing.

Right when he was about to enter the living room, a hand gripped his wrist and a familiar warmth made him stop in his motion.

“It’s not nothing, man.”

Was King gritting his teeth? Ram still didn’t dare to look.

“I know you, Ram. Why would you stand in the darkness like that? Did anything happen? Are you okay?”

“Why do you care?”

The words shocked Ram as well as King into freezing up.  
No, Ram hadn’t planned to say anything at all. Least of all an accusation like that.

“What?”

King’s voice was carefully neutral and Ram felt the heat rise in his cheeks and neck.

“Nothing”, he shook his head violently, “Nothing.”

For a few seconds, the silence stretched between them, but King’s grip didn’t loosen up one bit. If anything, it became tighter.

Maybe because King had to think about what to do next. Maybe because he knew already. Which would be good, because Ram had no idea where this was headed. Where he even wanted it to head.

“Why do you say it then?”

King’s words were so quiet, Ram wondered for a second if he had misheard. When he turned instinctively, King’s gaze was directed towards the floor.

He looked so helpless, so vulnerable, Ram wanted to pull him close and shield him from any harm, any danger, the world, really. But in this case, it was himself who had inflicted the pain.

And so, instead of embracing the man he loved, Ram stood still and waited. For anything, really.

But nothing could have prepared him for the desperation in King’s eyes when he finally lifted his head. His heart did a somersault as if it planned to escape.

“Why?”

His tongue felt dry and thick in his mouth, but Ram still managed to speak. Or at least to attempt it.

“You’re away.”

Desperation was replaced by confusion.

“Long.”

Dawning understanding cleared the frown on King’s face, even if it didn’t diminish the worry.

“You mean in the evening?”

A careful nod.

“But I told you, I am ...”

King stopped when he saw the look in Ram’s eyes.

“No”, Ram swallowed, “No.”

Once more, they stared at each other and King seemed to fight with himself. Ram’s insides tightened as he wondered what it was about. Would King confess to liking someone now? What was behind all of this?

Letting out a deep sigh, King’s grip loosened, making Ram afraid he would let go. Where would he be then?

“Come on”, King said softly and if Ram hadn’t lost his mind, he could have detected the glimpse of nervousness, fear even.

But he followed his love none the less, until they stood, surrounded by plants and light, in the living room.

At Ram’s questioning look, King blushed even more furiously: “It’s better than the hallway.”

Then he took out his phone with his free hand, not letting go even for a second. As if Ram would go anywhere unless King pushed him. No matter how much he had thought about it already. But the truth was, he wouldn’t be able to go if there was a slight chance of staying close to King somehow.

Suddenly, King held up the phone with the screen pointing towards Ram, taking Ram by surprise.

“Look”, King demanded and Ram blinked until the screen in front of him was in focus again. In focus and showing ... King ... with a dog. A small dog, to be fair, but it was a dog and King wasn’t freaking out. At least not visibly.

“What?”

King swiped to the next and it also showed King with a dog, but a different one this time. In this, King even seemed to smile, scratching the back of the dog’s head in a way which made Ram irrationally jealous.

He blinked again and King swiped further ... and further ... and further.

All the pics showed the same. Or almost.

It was always King with a dog, sometimes even the same, more often a different one. And each time the size of the dog grew, making Ram wonder how King had survived this.

But most of all, Ram was confused. What did this mean?  
He looked over the phone at King, trying to convey his question with his eyes alone.

It was more by instinct than a conscious decision when Ram turned his hand and held on to King’s wrist now, King letting loose completely.

“I ...”, King’s features darkened even more, but he kept their eyes locked, “I was at the shelter.”

Ram could have guessed, but it didn’t answer the question of ‘Why? For fuck’s sake?’

“I went to the shelter for two weeks now.”

At least this explained where he truly had been. But still not an answer to why.

“I ...”, by now Ram was sure King’s face was hot enough to set anything on fire, “I wanted to get used to dogs so I could go on a walk with you and your dogs without freaking out!”

The rest of the words had been a rush, ringing in Ram’s head as he stared and stared and stared.

What?

“I asked the caretaker and they said I could try and let me cuddle the small ones first and we slowly moved to bigger ones and I’m not sure if I’ve overcome my fear completely, but it’s definitely better and seriously, I found this really adorable pitbull and even went on a walk with her today, which made me late again, even though I promised myself to come back earlier.”

King was breathing hard, his wrist trembling in Ram’s grasp, as he continued to watch Ram, desperate for any reaction.

“I ...”, Ram coughed, “I ... what?”

Looking as if he wanted to run away, King finally averted his gaze.

“Sorry, I should have asked you first if you even want me to accompany you on your walks with your dogs. This was stupid of me, but I really wanted to ...”

The rest of King’s words was lost forever, as Ram had captured his mouth with his, pulling his roommate, his partner, his love close with a rush he had never experienced before.

He held King close as the sensation of feeling King’s lips against his own electrified every nerve in his body, made him press and halt, wonder and yearn. He had let go of King’s wrist though, gripping his waist and cupping his cheek as tender and desperate as possible.

If this was the only time, he would make it count.  
If this was his only chance, he would remember it forever.

But King kissed back without a second thought, reacting so instinctively, it surprised Ram almost to the point of stopping. But there were hands at his neck, buried in his hair, suddenly and demanding, urging Ram on. As if he hadn’t been the one to initiate this.

And so, after a second of wonder, Ram followed the pull and engulfed King in the embrace he had long since wanted to share.

~~~

“You could have told me”, Ram muttered against King’s throat as they lay on their bed, their limbs entangled and their minds content but tired from the emotional turmoil and endless hours of love confessions and kisses and hugs.

“It was supposed to be a surprise”, King replied and Ram could see the eye-roll without looking up. Although ... looking up would provide him with a free view of his finally-boyfriend. For hours, if he wanted so.

“I worried.”

Fingers scratched his scalp and Ram closed his eyes once more, deciding he could watch later.

“I am sorry. I didn’t think you would overthink so much.”

Ram let out a few huffs but kept his eyes closed.

“Okay, okay, I was overthinking as well, I admit it. But I seriously wanted to surprise you and never imagined you could think I was cheating.”

How?

“I know you”, King cuddled closer as if to make sure this was reality, “At least most of the time. Didn’t think you would react with a confession though. Not that I’m complaining, but I hadn’t expected you to reciprocate my feelings at all. Still can’t believe it, to be honest.”

Well, Ram couldn’t accept that, could he?

He opened his eyes once more, locked their eyes and slowly stretched, until their lips connected once more in an almost desperate moment. A groan escaped King and Ram grinned into the kiss like a satisfied cat.

“Let’s go for a walk together, tomorrow?”, King whispered when they parted once more, their foreheads pressed against each other and Ram lost in the presence of his lover.

“Yes”, he promised and cupped King’s cheeks once more, amazed by everything, really.

To know King had gone to overcome his fear of dogs for him, just to go on a walk with him. To know King had chosen to do so without proper guidance by a therapist, but relying solely on his own will and determination. To know King loved him so much. To know it all squeezed his heart in a good, unbelievable way.

To know ...

Wait. Ram’s mind reeled to a stop and he blinked a few times. King had faced his fears for him, had done what had probably been a stupid thing, which had surprisingly worked. Did this mean ... should he maybe ... just as an idea, go and visit a kindergarten?

“No!”

A gentle slap to his shoulder brought him back from the mind freeze and he blinked King into focus again.

“No?”

“You think too loud”, King grumbled, but seriously, he was half laughing, “And no need for such extreme measures! Dogs and plants are enough, really.”

Well, that was relieving, Ram had to admit as he snuggled closer once more.

“Also”, King murmured, “You would get adopted by some kids or caretakers instantly and I can’t accept that. You’re mine now.”

Content, Ram settled and refrained from reminding King how he had been adopted by those dogs as well.

Because really, who was he to complain?

~~~

When they first visited Lara the pit bull together, Ram realised two things.

One: this was about to become a fight for King’s attention.

And two: they would totally take her back home.

And really, he couldn’t be happier. After all, his hand was held by King, his roommate, his partner, his lover. And he wouldn’t let go.

the End

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> Please let me know if you like it ;)
> 
> -> for requests and joined screaming, feel free to message me: morathicain.tumblr.com


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